Thursday, September 11, 2014

Things that are upsetting me lately... the unorganized, potpourri edition

Just some things I've been musing about for awhile... Strap in.

Why are so many kids little fucking shits? Back when I was a kid (I was a child of the 70s/80s), kids respected their elders... period. And if they didn't, they sure as hell knew to keep their mouths shut and not throw a fucking tantrum about something being unfair. If they did, they better be ready to endure the shit storm that was going follow.

In our quest to keep up with the Joneses we've allowed a basic premise of parenting to slide by the wayside.... parenting. If your kid doesn't do anything but play videogames during the summer and is disrespectful to you when you tell him/her to stop it, then asking "What do I do? I've tried "EVERYTHING" on social media.  

No you haven't. If you had, you would have yanked that fucking gaming system out of the wall and taken his/her other shit away too. Are you a dainty flower who is worried about her son overpowering her? That's not a problem. I'm sure you know a man or neighbor who you get along with well enough, who is bigger than your boy and who your kid is not going to mouth off too. Still a problem? Drive your kid to the local Police station... they'll still stick your kid in a cell free of charge for a couple of hours, so that they think about why it's important to respect Mom and Dad.

Stop listening to or getting advise from people on social media... me included. Trust your gut as a parent. No one is a fucking expert when it comes to kids... if someone is telling you they are, then they're a fucking liar or suffering from delusions of grandeur. Every single kid that you will have is going to be different than the other. They will have different needs and act differently. What parenting method worked on one, won't work on the other. Think of parenting as a game of chess.

Chess: Being able to change game strategies and tactics, as your opponent changes his/hers... is necessary to win.

Parenting: being able to adapt and change your parenting methods, as your children display different personalities/behaviors is necessary to be successful.

Not recommended for washing out your kid's mouth, but great
for washing dishes and keeping your hands looking young.
Is profanity a problem with your kid? There is no such thing as soap poisoning... your kid won't die and it's not abuse (provided you're not a dumb ass, who dumps half a bottle of Palmolive down your kid's suck hole) I'm talking about tried and true bar soap. Worked on just about every kid I know. We may have swore around each other after, but we sure as fuck didn't do it around our parents or anyone else's parents.

Discipline. Different aged children require different discipline methods. A single pop on the ass and a "No" to get their attention when they're little... I guarantee that's going to get Cutsiepoo's attention, more so than a time out when they're 2 or 3. They're also not going to remember getting that Pop on the ass when they're adult. I'm not talking about a belt or a paddle to the ass either. I'm talking about your hand and their little butts. It doesn't need to be hard. It's a pop. It's an attention getter. It's not to meant to hurt, its meant to get their attention and stop the behavior. Their little butts fit in the palms of your hands for a reason... just saying. Don't be afraid to use when necessary.

Not for spanking your kids... if you're using this then you're a sadist.

As your kids move into the young child stage, spankings aren't going to be very effective. Timeouts? A better alternative, because your kid can now rationalize and better understand the concept of right and wrong; and think about why his/her behavior was wrong as they sit there. (They're also probably developed enough logic, to ask you why you're hitting them if hitting is wrong)    

My kids are older now, so would I try to spank my 13 year old or put him in a timeout? Of course not. In fact, I haven't spanked Mini in years. When he does wrong, which isn't often, his mother and I ground him or take his cool shit away. Whether its a gaming system or his phone. The same goes for Special K. At 10, she gets things taken away too or she may end up not getting to go to a classmate's birthday party / sleep over.

See what I've done there? Over the years I've changed and adapted, based on what works best for my kids... because there isn't a one size fits all. Maybe you have a genius child that was capable of logic and rationalizing, while he/she was doing calculus in the womb... obviously then a spanking for your kid won't work. He/She already knows its not good to run into the street chasing after a ball or that throwing sand is bad. 

Two more things on kids and we'll move along. 

Circumcision... do I have my own opinion on it? Yes I do and I'm quite passionate about it. Am I going to get up all in your business with my opinion, when it comes time for you to decide. Nope. None of my business. If you ask me about it. I'll calmly tell you my opinion on it and then advise you to seek advise from others as well. 

Breastfeeding in public... It's a boob. Whip that bitch out and let your child suckle away. It's a natural process of a mother feeding her child. If someone finds it offensive, then they're the problem. With that being said... if you're in a place and for whatever reason they have signs that say no breastfeeding. Respect that or stop patronizing that small ass minded place immediately. If they ask you to cover up and your baby tolerates that... then cover up, feed your baby and THEN stop patronizing that small-ass minded place. I'm sorry, but it's still taboo. That's REALLY stupid I know. Eventually it will get to a place where it isn't, but until it is... let's have respect for each other... not just ourselves.

That brings me to entitlement... when the fuck did we become a nation of entitlement? This attitude that its all about me and mine. It's one thing to say "Please mind your own business". It's another for one person or group to say you need to re-write the rules for me or for us. This is really pertaining to situations where one group feels that they're entitled to something to be provided for free. Repeat after me... there is no such thing as a free lunch. If it's something you need, shouldn't you pay for it, if you're an able bodied person capable of work? Are there exceptions? Of course, sometimes people  need REAL help and giving help is a noble thing... and sometimes the only right thing to do. However, is providing shit for free to people on an ongoing basis, at the expense of others a long term solution? No. I don't believe it is. Why? Someone always has to pay. Whether it's your employer or taxpayers... someone is paying for it.

Female empowerment. Something has been bugging me since the MTV VMAs. I saw a lot of comments and remarks flying around social media about female empowerment and a LOT of "go girls"!!! Really??? Because to me, Nicki Minaj looked like a whore and was "dancing" much like some strippers I've seen. I'm sorry, but I don't equate scantily clad women gyrating and twerking like hookers to being powerful, independent and sexy women. When I think of strong women that are music artists, who've pushed for female empowerment. I think of artists like Shania Twain, Pink, and Kelly Clarkson. Women who sang about female independence and empowerment without having to drop to their skivvies and shake their ass to make a point. And they're all incredibly sexy as fuck too I might add. That's just my opinion though.

These women and girls are role models to young girls and tweens. Do you really want your young daughters to emulate the dancing and dressing of some of these young, music artists? I for one don't. I want us to teach our daughters that they can be confident, independent and sexy without putting their bodies on display. So yes, to me it is about clothes. Simply put and with apologies to Dr. Seuss...

Short-short shorts and cropped up tops. I will not, do not, like these clothes.

As parents, especially the Moms out there, please teach your daughters to respect, love and clothe the body they have. Most importantly, please teach her to dress for the venue she is going too. Tell her if she has to ask herself is this outfit appropriate for where I'm going... chances are, it's not. I'm not stating that shorts aren't appropriate or that a short skirt is unacceptable. You all know the clothing I'm talking about. Tweens wearing shorts that stop just short of the natural crease between the hips and legs... Teens wearing skin tight leggings with nothing covering the bum or skirts that would do a 20 y/o club dress wearer proud. I'm not a prude... but for fuck's sake... c'mon.... these are young ladies. They need guidance and direction.  

Lolita-ish... not age appropriate for your daughter. Totally
appropriate for you to wear for your husband.

Short, but still cute and
leaves something to the imagination

Dad's... teach your sons to respect girls and women. That girl is someone's daughter, someone's sister. That woman is all the above and probably someone's mother. WE have to make sure our boys respect women. They don't learn it on their own. This is something that has to be taught to them and that they see US doing as well. Part of how we can do that is by putting the shoe on the other foot. How would they feel if it was their sister or it was their Mom that was being ogled.

Men are visual. We get turned on by what we see, but we have to teach our sons control though. We have to make sure our sons understand that even if a girl is dressed like a hooker, she may not want sex. Or... if she does want sex, that she may change her mind. That whole concept of "a woman's prerogative" that they didn't teach us about in school... yeah that. We have to teach that to our sons and ensure they understand that when a girl says "No!"... it means just that, "No!"  

Look we can't keep teens from being teens... or stopping girls from changing clothes when one they step outside. Maybe however, by having open and honest dialogue about sex... maybe then the mystery won't be as much of a mystery.

I'm got a lot more on my mind... but this is getting too long and I really have to get some real work done. As always comments welcome. Be respectful. Please present dissenting opinions with intelligent responses. (Proper grammar as well, if you'd like a response)



  1. Excellent. You had a lot to say and all of it grand. xx

    1. Thank you Precious P. Not sure what caused my mind to go into hyper drive this morning.

  2. Agree with every word, I was a 90 ' s baby but still grew up the same. Was raised by grandma! Still I agree and use many of these methods or reasonings with my own children today I don't want them growing up like the rest of crap we see!

    1. Anonymous... its really that simple. Children can't grow up to be productive and good adults, if they don't receive the proper guidance when they are children.

  3. Bravo! If I didn't know any better, I would swear you are in my head. "Little shits" and "Entitlement"...two of the biggest problems in society today. As a mother of three grown daughters, your points on proper attire really hit home. One of the worst fights my oldest and I got into..revolved around this subject. Girls are in too big of a hurry to "grow up" and the fashion industry certainly doesn't help, in my opinion. Thanks for sharing all the thoughts that I could never put into words..well done..xo

    1. I'm totally in your head... stalking you ;-)
      Yes... you get it... these are young girls. They need to be treated as young ladies. which is to say properly.

  4. The little shits and entitlement. Stands and claps.

    1. They're out there. The most important people in a village are Mom and Dad.

  5. Excellent article Munch!!!


Leave feedback.... it's the only way I know if you enjoyed what you read.